yygall

Outside an office building in Shinjuku, a well-dressed young woman paced back and forth in front of the entrance, occasionally glancing at her watch. Clad in a white dress shirt, sleek black pants and a pair of black Loubutin heels, her clothes exuded classic chicness and elegant efficiency, yet her aura was one of unease and nervousness, with a hint of dread. She was impatient, yet visibly afraid: it was a warm August morning, yet her face was as pale as her shirt, and her body trembled in the warm breeze, Her fingers were wrapped tightly around her cellphone, as though she was trying to break it by the strength of her hand, yet unwilling to do so as she waited for it to ring.

It didn't.

Instead, a fit, smartly dressed man, probably in his thirties, could be seen rushing up the stairs, making his way hastily towards her. His dark suit hid broad shoulders and a well-built body, attracting looks from the OL's who were making their daily trek to the office, but failed to gain hers. Once he found her, he gave a small bow, to attract her attention. She turned, returned his bow, and after a brief greeting, the pair made their way into the building.

When the elevators door opened at the top floor, panic gripped Yuuki. Last time she was here, Johnny had photos of her with four of his boys, three of them from the same group. It ended up with him offering her a cheque, then a job, both of which she refused. She hated to even ponder what his thoughts of her would be, when he finds out that she was the beneficiary of the trust he was appointed to manage. She wanted to crawl into a corner and just stay there, and wait for everything to sort itself out. She didn't know what to expect last time she was in that office, but this time she didn't want to go into that office for entirely different reasons.

She was terrified.

She was terrified of Johnny's reaction, terrified of the unknown that was before her. But that was nothing compared to her fear of discovering what happened between Johnny and her grandmother. How they became connected. What their relationship was. She hated to think that her grandmother was with anyone but her grandfather—a wise, kind, sweet old man who loved his entire family more than he loved himself; a man who would do anything and everything in his power for his wife, and for everyone around him. It was all too strange, and incomprehensible. And the more Yuuki thought about it, the less Yuuki wanted anything to do with it.

"Lee-san, daijoubu?" Tanaka, her grandmother's lawyer, the thirty-something handsome man who was with her, asked in a concerned voice.

Yuuki shook her head weakly in reply. She didn't want this; she wanted none of this. She just wanted her life to return to normal and to the way things were, before it all became so complicated.

Tanaka sighed. Despite his short years in the industry, the nature of his work meant that he met, on almost a daily basis, people of all kinds. It wasn't hard for him to gain an idea of what was going through Yuuki's mind at that moment. The poor girl, just fresh out of college, must be still in shock— from his dealings with her grandmother, it wasn't hard to tell that the two women, despite their difference in years, were extremely close. It wasn't unusual for beneficiaries to be in shock when wills were carried out.

"Lee-san, I know this is probably very hard for you. But the sooner we get this done, the better it will be for everyone, especially you. I know it must be difficult to accept that your grandmother has passed away, but she wouldn't want to see you like this. She left this will because she wanted to see you happy, and provided for in life. It's probably beyond my station to ask you this, but are you sure you want your grandmother to see you like this? Are you sure what you're doing right now is something Elizabeth Lee's granddaughter should be doing?"

Yuuki trembled. She remembered the day her grandmother listened to her random thoughts, as she picked out a Japanese name for herself. It was a beautiful, sunny day; they were sitting on the balcony, surrounded by blossoms of spring as they enjoyed the crisp, fresh air with their cups of Lady Grey.

"Grandma, which one do you like better? Yuuki, or Masako?"

"They both sound lovely, dear."

"Grandma! You're supposed to help me pick one! I can't have two Japanese names, that'd be weird!"

"Ah, is that so? Hmmm… let's see…" Elizabeth replied her granddaughter, as she slowly put on her reading glasses. "Yuuki and Masako, was it? What do the names mean?"

"Yuuki is written with the characters for 'excellence' and 'discipline', and is phonetically the same as the word for courage in Japanese. Masako is literally 'elegant child', and written that way too."

Elizabeth took a penetrating look at her granddaughter, before she made a reply. "Well, child, to me you will always be beautiful and elegant. But I like the first one better. I see more than just beauty and elegance in you. You will always be, in my eyes, the best granddaughter, friend and family anyone can hope for. You have always been disciplined in your life, with or without the help of others. But most of all, I see a fire in you, the fire of courage, and strength, and I hope you won't ever lose that, my dear Yuuki."

It was the last happy moment they shared together, free from worries, fears, and sadness, before Elizabeth was diagnosed as terminally ill with cancer. Yuuki tried to stay strong, for her grandmother's sake; but as the old lady worsened, it took more and more of Yuuki's strength to put on a brave face, and stay by her grandmother's side. When she died, that was it for Yuuki. Her strength and courage seemed to have left with her grandmother, as she found herself not only mourning the loss of a beloved family member, but also completely heartbroken by the actions of the man who was supposed to be her boyfriend.

But this was not what her grandmother would want. She was Yuuki, supposed to be courageous and strong even during times of adversity, not some whimpering cowardly weakling. But taking the first step out of her shell for herself was hard, much harder than staying strong for someone else. She didn't want to step out of her past, and into the unknown; yet she knew that lingering in bygones was the worst thing to do in such a situation.

She looked at Tanaka with eyes asking for help. She was lost, more lost than ever, and she had hoped that Aiba would, at least, come to her rescue. But this was real life, and not a fairy tale; not all Damsels in Distress are saved, and even then, their rescuers may not always be Prince Charmings.

Tanaka smiled, and stretched his hand out, as though offering a hand to pull her out of her abyss of depression. It was ironic, how the man who was supposed to be closest to her at that moment, who was supposed to be her support, as she had been his, was nowhere in sight; and the only offer of help came from someone she had just met, yet read her so well, and so thoroughly. Sure, he may have no idea of her relationship with Johnny, the Jimusho and some of the artists, but his frank words reminded her of her responsibilities and duties, pulling her out of the pits of despair, and back into the real world. It was exactly what she needed; and it was fortunate that the help did not come too late, even if the help was from someone she had just met.

Perhaps, in the current circumstances, Tanaka made a better saviour than Aiba. Their relationship was simple, and had just started; to each other, they were a little more than being just complete strangers, but not enough to know every detail of each others' lives. It gave her space, a luxury she craved from the suffocating questions which would inevitably arise had one of her friends, or family, were the first to discover her in such a state. And she knew that, after the issues with the trust are resolved, Tanaka would, at most, maintain nothing more than a professional lawyer-client relationship with her. A confidante was not something she needed right now; and thankfully Tanaka was not, and probably would never be that sort of person in her life.

It was time to step out, and face reality, Yuuki decided. She took his helping hand, and walked out of the lift, with her head high. Even if she lacked confidence inside, the least she could do was not to show her weakness to others. She was Yuuki, all strength and courage, a woman who did not need to depend on anyone but herself.

It was precisely 8:00am, when Tanaka and Yuuki entered Johnny's office. The place had not changed since she was last here, more than two years ago; yet the people who last met here had both changed so much. Johnny looked much older, and in some ways, weaker; the walking stick beside his desk was not missed by Yuuki. And when he saw the girl behind Tanaka, a flicker of surprise appeared in Johnny's eyes: just when you think you've seen it all, life throws yet another shock at you, he thought. The girl was no longer the wide-eyed, innocent and naïve soul he met two years ago; she had matured, but the warmth and energy she once exuded had given way to reservation and quiet acquiescence. But that was nothing compared with the shock of discovering that Yuuki was Elizabeth's granddaughter, for that was what occupied his mind presently.

Johnny rose unsteadily from his seat, inviting the guests to sit down, as his secretary brought in some tea and snacks, before quitting the room. His face was serious, and quiet; Yuuki, on the other hand, kept her eyes downcast, staring at her hands in her lap.

It was Tanaka who broke the uneasy silence. "I'm sure we're all aware of why we're here today. Mr Kitagawa, if you don't mind…"

"So you're Elizabeth's granddaughter," Johnny spoke, with his usual obstinate tone.

"Yes." Yuuki replied, in an equally flat voice.

Tanaka eyed the two, his brows furrowed questioningly. But he kept his silence: such details were the clients' business, and not his. Observing the awkward atmosphere, he pulled out the documents from his briefcase, and set them on the table. "I've drafted the necessary documents for the transfer, and will just need you to sign them before me—Mrs Lee has asked that I must witness this."

"Well, Yuuki, do you want the shares?" Johnny asked.

"I don't, Mr Kitagawa." She replied, coolly.

Johnny raised his brow; Yuuki was nothing but surprises. "You don't? Then why the transfer?"

"Because that's the only way I can gain access and control them." Yuuki answered simply.

"And why do you want to gain access and control?"

"So that I can sell the lot to the highest bidder." Yuuki raised her eyes, and stared into Johnny's eyes. "Well, Mr Kitagawa, what is your offer? I am happy for the company to buy it back, or sell them to you."

He laughed, surprising both Yuuki and Tanaka. "Kid, you sound just like Elizabeth. I should have known that you were her granddaughter long ago."

It was Yuuki's turn to furrow her brows in confusion. "Well, Mr Kitagawa, are you willing to terminate the trust, and transfer the title to me?"

The old man merely grabbed a pen, and signed the documents without so much as a second thought, before turning the documents over to Yuuki. A myriad of emotions washed over her, as she stared at the papers, pen in hand; once she signed them, the final part of her grandmother's will would be executed. She'd have one-fifth of the shares in Johnny and Associates, one of the biggest and most powerful companies in the Japanese entertainment industry. Sure, the last thing she wanted right then and there was more links to the company, but this was the reality before her: and the only thing she could do was to face it. Gritting her teeth, she signed the papers, and handed them to her late grandmother's lawyer.

Replacing the papers in his briefcase, Tanaka smiled gently. "Thank you. If you don't mind, I'll take my leave now. Good day to you both."

With that, Tanaka, the lawyer, walked out of the office. It was time for Johnny and Yuuki to resolve their issues—on their own.

"I…I guess I should get going too. Goodb—"

"When did she leave, Yuuki?" Johnny asked, in a frighteningly calm voice. "When… and how?"

Yuuki sat back down gingerly. "She passed two months ago. It was cancer: by the time they found it, it was in the last stages already. She was on morphine for six months before she left."

Johnny smiled sadly. "So she wasn't in much pain."

Yuuki nodded. "She wanted to retain her dignity; she didn’t let us tell anyone other than immediate family, either."

"That's so Elizabeth. It's just like her: dignified, obstinate, and so graceful." Johnny remarked, nostalgia evident in his voice. "Did she tell you how she got the shares?"

Yuuki shook her head. "She never told anyone about them. I found out in the will, but no one else knows, apart from the lawyers."

"I see. She really did keep her promise; I thought she would have at least told you, Yuuki."

She remained unmoved; Yuuki was certain that her grandmother's decision to keep this part of her life hidden must have been with good reason, and saw no useful purpose in learning the facts, with reality the way it is now. Nevertheless, Johnny continued.

"It was early days of the company. Merry had just sold the bar, and put all the money from that into the business, but I was still tight on cash. Sure, Fujishima—Merry's husband— probably could have found more investors, but he had done so much with his network in the media industry, I didn't want to be a burden.

"My father suggested that I pay a visit to Joseph Lee. I had my reservations, considering the war had left the Japanese and the Chinese basically on two very opposing sides. Still, desperate times called for desperate measures, and I went to New York in hope of catching this Joseph Lee.

"As fate would have it, Joseph Lee wasn't in New York when I visited his office; he had gone to Washington on urgent business. A woman, who I presumed to be his secretary, let me in, and listened to my proposal. She was easily the most graceful and elegant woman I had met: there was something reassuring about the air around her, and I managed to tell her everything about my business, and the plans I had for it, while she merely listened quietly.

After I finished, though, the shock came. She told me that there was no way Mr Lee would invest in such a company. That he would never work with a Japanese, even if the Japanese had American citizenship. I was furious, to say the least. She was just the secretary: what would she know about business? I was ready to blow, but somehow managed to hold my tongue. It proved to be the best decision I had ever made.

'But, of course, that's what my husband would do. My husband has his business to worry about, and the last thing he needs is for his peers to perceive him as a traitor to his country and people. What men don't understand about war, Mr Kitagawa, that it is all politics. It doesn't reflect the wishes of the individual: both our countries, our people have lost so much as a result of decisions of those wielding power. But the war is now over, and it's about time we all moved on.

 I'm not quite that concerned about perception and reputation. Which is why I'm more than happy to invest in your company, Mr Kitagawa, in my personal name. As long as this stays between you and me only, it's a win for both of us, won't it?'

Three days later, a cheque was sent to my hotel, for two hundred thousand US Dollars, to purchase a 20% share in the company. With the contract of sale was a signed letter of proxy, which turned over all her voting rights to me, until her death, or mine, whichever should occur first. She was basically giving me money and asked for no control over the company: I couldn't have asked for more. Without her help at that time, Johnny and Associates wouldn't be here today."

Tears welled up in Yuuki's eyes, as she listened to Johnny's sincere yet simple recount of his dealings with her grandmother. It was so like her to do such a thing: and in a way, she felt closer to her grandmother than before. Yet, learning this after her death meant that unlike with the previous stories she heard from her parents, Yuuki could no longer run back into her grandmother's arms, and ask if the stories were true, or request for the stories to be retold, from her grandmother's own perspective. She never felt a stronger wish, a stronger need to see her grandmother, yet that was no longer possible. All Yuuki had now were her memories, and the memories of others. Was that enough? Would that ever be enough?

The simple answer was no; but there was nothing Yuuki could do about it now. Elizabeth Lee was gone, eternally; and Yuuki could only fill the void her grandmother left behind by learning more about Elizabeth's legacy, through the memories and recollections of others, as well as her own. Slowly, she raised her head, until her eyes met with Johnny's. "Thank you, Johnny-san. But it's time to give the shares back to you: it's why Grandma left them to me, in the first place."

"No, Yuuki. Keep them. For my sake. As my tribute to your generous grandmother. " The old man said, seriously. "Please. I insist."

Yuuki could only nod in consent. "If that's what you want, I'm happy to comply."

"Good." Johnny's tone was commanding, but approval was clear in his voice. He opened his mouth, ready to say something, but decided against it; instead, he chose to study Yuuki closely, the eyes which had read so many tried to read into the depths of her soul, searching for something. Yuuki held the gaze, somewhat confused, but more than anything, she tried to hide those feelings she had for a certain artist in the talent agency. Finally, losing confidence in herself, she broke the gaze. She pretended to glance at her watch.

"I'm sorry, Johnny-san, I have to go. My boss expects me for a meeting this morning." It was a blatant lie, but a necessary one: the later she got out of the office, the greater the chances of running into someone she knew at the Jimusho—and that was the last thing she needed. As soon as the words came out, she instantly regretted it: Johnny gave a soft chuckle, a scoff—he knew she was making excuses.

But his experience had given him wisdom, and Johnny knew that some things were better left alone. He merely watched as Yuuki walked, ever so slowly and carefully out of his office.

Finally alone, Johnny took out a small key, and unlocked the top drawer of his large mahogany desk. Gingerly, he took out a small stack of envelopes, spotted yellow over the years, and stared at the letters, elegantly handwritten, which spelled out his name and address. His eyes filled with a look of nostalgia and gratitude, as a faint, faraway smile appeared on the old man's face. One by one, he placed them on his desk, opening each envelope with the utmost care, and read each letter with great concentration. Rare tears gathered, as Johnny remembered the woman who had saved him, and his company, yet asked for nothing in return.

A great woman may have left, and moved on beyond life; but her shadow remains, so long as the people she touched hold on to memories of her existence, and treasures them.

The least he could do now was to watch over Yuuki, as Elizabeth watched over him.